2 Corinthians 7--the key to restoring relationships

This chapter in many ways highlights the restoration of the relationship between Paul and the Corinthians. When relationships are damaged, we often look in our toolbox for tools such as justice, explanations and apologies. These are necessary items, but beneath all of it, there must be a desire for reconciliation. When we have been hurt, our instincts move us towards justice rather than reconciliation. What is the alternative?

Paul demonstrates the alternative in this passage. It is called affection. Paul was clearly hurt and slandered by the Corinthians. Yet, he did not allow that to spoil his affection for the Corinthians. Paul told the Corinthians that he kept space in his heart for them. He asks them to make room in their hearts for him.

Our heart is the seat of our affection. It has a scarce amount of room. Not only that, but the heart is the engine for the emotions. Paul is calling his people to manage their hearts. See, the strain of relationships can bring bitterness, resentment, and disdain into the heart. That can squeeze another out of our affections. Then, when the relationship is called upon and tested, the desire to make it work and do the right thing isn’t there. From here, the hard work of justice, forgiveness and apology becomes so much more difficult.

Paul uses means to maintain the affection. He uses his words in various letters (this chapter introduces an unknown letter known as the sorrowful letter). He does not use his authority to restore the relationship, but speaks from weakness (2 Cor 2-4,11-12). Paul teaches about how respond to a rebuke. In the face of a rebuke, we can have worldly sorrow (i.e. they don’t like me, I am ashamed, I got caught) or we can have Godly sorrow (contrition and acknowledgement of wrong-doing) that will lead to repentance.

This is where a relationship with God makes all of the difference in our regular relationships. When we take our sorrow to God, process it before him, we save ourselves from needing to be right, needing the relationship to be right and being free to doing right, even if it is risky like Paul models. Then we can trust the rest to God. That being true, we can hold out grace towards those who injure us without needing them to respond to us in kind. We can still maintain affection for those who will not return it to us. That is how God treats us.

Posted by Marc